Obsession

What exactly is an obsessive personality? Is it the same as an addictive personality? How does one become obsessive and why? When? Is there a specific time or situation in which someone becomes easily obsessed? If there is, I am in that time of my life. If not, I suppose that would put me under the category of an "obsessive personality".

Obsessive personality: "A type of personality characterized by the manifestation of a rigid, pervasive pattern of perfectionism and inflexibility as the individual strives persistently for obvious unattainable and implausible goals, to the point that the actual completion of tasks and projects are frequently interfered by such behavior."

So basically, someone with this "disorder" becomes engrossed with one or multiple goals, goes to great lengths to do everything humanly possible to achieve them, and their undying efforts are so intense they only get in the way of their success.

Now, I'm no doctor but I'm going to go out on a limb here with a self-diagnosis. I don't believe I am getting in my own way all the time, though sometimes I am, but I have been getting rather attached to things, people, and activities as of late.

The most obvious of these current "obsessions" would be the ridiculous amount of effort I'm putting into keeping my relationship. That is also where I see myself getting in my own way. While trying to make sure everything is perfect I make myself seem demanding, controlling and bitchy. That isn't me. I try to express my feelings hoping to improve the relationship and end up getting into some kind of argument because of my temper. When I see activities or behavior that might be detrimental to our relationship it makes my temper even shorter and I end up ruining what I was trying to fix.

I could go into intricate details about this "disorder" and my connection to it and that specific example, but that would go on forever.

All I ask is: How do I fix this glitch in my personality? How do I rid myself of the insecurity that causes this irrational and unnecessary behavior?

Help me fix myself. I need these things I'm striving to keep to remain stable.